Half is me.
To do, or do not?
That, was the question that haunted me from the early rays of the breaking dawn to the late hours of the unceasing night.
For the whole of last week, I felt like I was sitting on a nest of ants, torn between two answers that would have changed my ideals and responsibilities to come. The words “yes” and “no” are short and can be spelt out with ease; curiously, however, their meanings can bring a whole lot of difference to our actions.
I felt a slight tinge of regret at my eventual decision. But in all honesty, it did not really count as a decision; it was more like… a resignation. I was too tired to continue prodding my brain for the answer; instead, I opted to delay and let the deadline lapse. Then again, if the deadline were extended it would have meant subjecting myself to even more mental torture. And exhaustion. Which would inevitably lead to an explosion that would have rendered me beyond recognisation both in mind and body.
It was a debate in which I could neither win nor lose. Once again, I have willingly let the world go by me. Now, I can only console myself that perhaps, I really am not made out for this.
Something just went splat on the floor. Ah, it must be my brain.