Rantglass - because that's how things are.

Bucketsful or bucketfuls?

So… it has to come down to this.

But I really was not expecting things to happen that fast, and I cannot stomach the fact that I will be doing it again, starting over from scratch.

Just when I thought I am beginning to settle down and surrender to the monotony of it, I am bestowed with a generous alternative that will be the envy of many.

Logic, or some may say is pure common sense, dictates that I take the path that leads to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. The oasis out in the desert.

Still, something is holding me back. There are many factors, many reasons. But there has to be at least a solid one that takes the cake. Unfortunately, I have not quite put a finger to it.

It has become an unnecessary dilemma that, in actuality, could have been easily solved by others without so much of a batting of an eyelid.

Yeah, I do not know why I always want to torture myself with endless possibilities and what-ifs. I am always afraid that I will end up on a forked road, within a forked road. I never know which path to tread, and I worry incessantly.

I hope the sun will continue shining more than ever, because I find myself growing particularly attached to it at the final ticking moments. The great big ball of fire suddenly shines in a different light; I feel the warmth of friendship it extends to me, and revel in the excitement a new day brings.

But I will be walking away from all that.

The only thing I doubt I will miss, will be the late nights. Definitely.

Looks like I already have an answer.

Why do decisions always have to be that difficult to make?

Details of this entry.Saturday, October 01, 2005, filed under Personal.
This entry is open to comments.
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  1. “Bucketsful or bucketfuls?” – that’s a relatively easy question compared with “Buckets half full or half empty?”

    There’s nothing wrong with being careful and cautious in decision-making. Just don’t torture yourself afterwards about what would have happened if you had taken the other path.
    Tim Frost | 02/10/05 12:03 AM

  2. wah, so chim.
    i’ll take the decision i’ll enjoy better.
    and both are correct.
    soporific | 02/10/05 05:55 PM

  3. Tim – I’m just a terrible worrywort, I guess. Sigh… it’s a bad habit, I know – but I can’t help it.

    Soporific – What is ‘chim’ ah?
    Strizzt | 02/10/05 08:57 PM

  4. Hey, congratulations! Looks like you got a big break or something. Maybe you can tell me about it sometime. Would love to give you some opinions. :)
    Shom | 02/10/05 09:05 PM

  5. good luck, whatever path you choose :)
    the first few steps are always the hardest.
    tim | 02/10/05 10:50 PM

  6. I think Strizzt just junked her ‘single’ status…

    I think Sopo meant ‘cham’.
    Wonger | 03/10/05 10:39 AM

  7. Tell me! Tell me!
    Keat | 03/10/05 06:14 PM

  8. Shom – We’ll talk about it. :)

    Tim – Thanks. :) Yeah, things always seem to appear somewhat difficult in the beginning. Time, time, time – a universal solution of sorts, it is.

    Wonger – Hey, do not mislead the audience! :P

    Keat – No. :)
    Strizzt | 03/10/05 09:43 PM

  9. eh? i think it’s ‘chim’ = deep in hokkien. :)

    all the best strizzt!
    nerdook | 04/10/05 06:45 AM

  10. Nerdook – Ah, thank you. I don’t speak Hokkien. :D
    Strizzt | 04/10/05 09:20 AM

  11. hehehe. tak sabar2 nak together2 again. hohoho…
    echobrainless | 04/10/05 02:47 PM

  12. your posts are becoming as cryptic and vague as some of mine (for those who don’t know you, that is, like me)

    We have learned well from Lord Vague-der, we have… :)
    eyeris | 04/10/05 05:59 PM

  13. Echobrainless – Eeesh, budak ni… Yalah yalah, saya akan ke gurun dalam masa dua minggu.

    Eyeris – Heh heh, not a lot of people here actually know me that well. :D
    Strizzt | 05/10/05 09:34 AM

  14. wonger thought wrong. and not just in regards to strizzt.
    chim is chim. maybe more commonly used down south than here.
    soporific | 05/10/05 04:55 PM

  15. Hey, on your way to Gurun, stop by Kulim and I’ll take you to a movie. Eh? Eh?
    Ali | 05/10/05 10:50 PM

  16. Soporific – Wah. Didn’t know you can speak Hokkien.

    Ali – No, no: I am going to the Cyberjaya desert. :D I’ll keep in mind your offer for a movie though.. heh heh.
    Strizzt | 05/10/05 11:49 PM

  17. Aww shucks!
    Ali | 06/10/05 04:38 PM

  18. Ali – Heh. Well, I actually thought you work in KL.
    Strizzt | 06/10/05 09:38 PM

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