Rantglass - because that's how things are.

In bits and pieces.

In bits and pieces.

Somehow I have a myriad of emotions in me.

It is quite creepy to hear of a friend’s accident; I was just talking to her. It happened about three weeks ago now, and it was a miracle she got out of it alive, albeit with only some bruises here and there. The car was badly damaged, and police investigations are still ongoing. I only got to know of the accident about a week later, and was practically blaming myself for not being available or to lend her support – although we are usually only a few steps away from each other, since we live under the same roof. I guess that is what busy schedules and tons of work can do for you. To not give a damn about anything else other than the darn posters. To work on the music video day and night without even exchanging a hi with each other. I felt selfish, caring only for myself and not others. But then again, it is every man for himself.. or so they say.

I wonder if would I jump off a bridge into a river, to save someone I love. Although I do not know how to swim. Would I really put my life ahead of others?

I had a talk with my father last weekend. It was one of those sessions that can easily qualify as ‘father-and-son’ talk – the only difference being I am his daughter, of course. Or should I call it as a lecture? It is amazing what other’s observation on you can do to you. I digested his words, and hoped I will not be so gullible the next time. Or to only follow under others’ finger. But he is wise, and he knows more about me than I do. Somehow. I found it ironic when a lecturer said ‘Only you know yourself’ during a class at the start of this trimester. I had disagreed with her silently. I still do.

Do you really know yourself well? Kudos to you, if you do. Perhaps I am just too fickle and indecisive, that I do not know where I stand. Now, that does not really sound nice…

The Malaysian Shorts thingy I went to last night was quite interesting. It cultivated an interest for filmmaking in me, although I would still say a big no to animation. And one of those short movies made me listen to Damn Dirty Apes again. It would be awesome if the local arts scene is alive and thriving.

I know I should be studying, but I am not. I am feeling quite tired, but not physically drained. Just.. tired.

Argh. This entry really is in bits and pieces. Am I too?

On air now: The Man Who Told Everything, Doves

Details of this entry.Tuesday, April 01, 2003, filed under Blogger Archives.
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