Rantglass - because that's how things are.

Going back to life before this.

Going back to life before this.

It happens in the movies. Spy thrillers, undercover cops, double agents.

I think it is hard to have an alter-ego and lead a double life. The secrecy, the silence – of having to keep to yourself about who you really are. One wrong step, and you will end up inadvertently revealing yourself to the wrong people, for the wrong reasons. One wrong step, and another would put their powers of deduction and reasoning into good use; then disclose the previously concealed details to the public.

Just that one small step.

It is like looking through a veil, or tinted glass. You know a lot about the other people, but they fail to actually point out who you are. In other words, you involuntarily become a stalker, reading them quietly, and saying “I know” just a wee bit too soon. Either that, or you could try feigning ignorance and pretending to know absolutely nothing about the subject at hand.

Sometimes, you might feel like screaming out your identity; but you know that that simply cannot happen. Not especially when you have chosen to walk down this path.

Imagine robbers walking down the street in broad daylight, heading to the neighbourhood grocery shop for a box of cigarettes – without their ski masks and pistols. The spy working together with the very people he is up against. The undercover cop having to look out for a knife in his back every single day.

We either keep our identity well-hidden, or we do not. Slip. Gone.

We all do have our own alter-egos, I think. It works in many ways, although some can be controlled, and some not. You could be the pleasant young man who is ever smiling; but may transform into some sort a monster when confronted by an innocently persistent salesman. You could be the quiet and unassuming girl who, surprisingly, becomes the shopper-from-hell when greeted with the magical words of ‘sales’ and ‘discounts’, jumping queues and viciously fighting for the blue sequined blouse.

It is almost always the bad and negative things that we have to hide, is it not?

The new look to BolehBlogs is coming along fine. I hope to launch it by next month, though – which is, well, in a few day’s time. Volunteers and contributions are welcome, however. If you think you would like to help out in spreading the news about blogging, write/review the many blogging tools available, give a few blogging tips – essentially, just about anything that relates to blogs and online journals – drop me a mail. I think this project will go stagnant in a few months’ time, but it feels exciting to finally kick start it and put this long-delayed plan into motion anyway.

Details of this entry.Saturday, May 29, 2004, filed under Blogger Archives.
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