Made to stand precariously on a rickety chair,
Only to infamously butcher a well-known children’s lullaby,
And fail spectacularly at desperate attempts to blow out the candle.
The prank is all in good fun, sure; but getting just one miserable scoop of ice cream drowning underneath a shower of whipped cream in return, hardly compensates for the eternal embarrassment and sneering snickers that come soon after.
For all that trouble, I reckon I should have been given a multi-tiered banana split instead, made up of all kinds of ice cream flavours imaginable (from the usual plain but popular chocolate, to the dubious-sounding combination of sardines and brandy), and generously sprinkled with all manner of nuts, chips, berries, seeds and raisins. And provided free for the whole year round, of course.